The most unusual thing I ever stole? A snowman. The clock struck midnight, as I piled on my woolly winter clothes. I tiptoed out into the icy, nearly unbearable weather. As I started my trek to my destination, huge breezes stormed at me, stinging my face. I now wish I'd worn a few more layers. After questioning whether I should turn back or not, I realised my trek was over. I had arrived. As the realisation hit me, I was immediately sent into a trance. And then I saw it.
He looked magnificent; a tall, white mute beneath the winter moon. He was beautiful, every inch of him was perfect. The head, the body, the features. I'd never seen a snowman that would've taken so much time and effort to develop. BANG! I kicked off it's head. It dropped to the ground in millions of pieces. It was just a pile of snow on the floor. I placed the stones and the carrot, that created it's face, on top. It was as good as new. I picked up the mountain of snow. It was unbelievably heavy; it's freezing body against mine. A fierce chill ran through me; piercing my gut, my heart. Most people would wonder what I achieve from ruining people's happiness and I never have a valid answer.
Life's tough; for me, for everyone. I wanted children to know what it felt like to be me. To feel my pain, my suffering, my guilt, my dream. I wanted them to know what it was like to have tried your best in life and never achieved anything. I was born to lose. I wanted them to know what it feels like for your parents to practically give up on you. I wanted them to know what it feels like when your parents have been nothing but constantly let down and disappointed by you. I wanted them to hurt. I wanted them to feel invisible and as if they didn't have anyone to count on. As if they were alone.
Sometimes I steal things I don't need; it's not a must. It's become almost a routine for me. I'll break into an innocent person's warm home and rummage through their belongings. I sometimes see an odd camera lying around. I'll even often pinch it, just to take a look through what I don't
have; memories. Seeing people's gleaming smiles in picture after picture, some what fills the space that, for me, has never been filled. I'm a mucky ghost. I make a mess, leave and no-one would ever reveal my identity. No-one ever knows it's me. I walk past a mirror in a strangers bedroom and see my murky reflection. A reflection that I hate to look at; one I can't keep my eyes on for longer then a couple of seconds. I can't stand to look at myself and what I've become.
I had to reassemble the snowman. I couldn't just leave it there; broken, reflecting myself. I didn't like it so I would never leave anything in the same position. It took me a lot of effort, but I didn't care how long it took me, it's not like I didn't have enough time. I don't care what I spend my time on anymore, I'm just throwing it away. I'm wasting my life, just waiting for the day when I don't have a care in the world anymore. The snowman didn't look the same; I stood back and took a run at it. I booted it's torso, over and over again. Until I was standing alone amongst lumps of snow, sick of the world.
My reason for stealing? Boredom. There's nothing else to it. When you're a kid; you'd never expect, in an odd 10 years, to be living your life a fail, a fraud. I've lived the past 10 years of my life, as nothing. No-one. I've never meant anything to anyone. And being alone in this world, leads to boredom. Boredom of your self, and the extent of your life. You start talking to yourself, going crazy almost. I'm all over the place and there's nothing I can do. I was born this way. I was born to lose, to be unloved. I've never felt wanted, needed, loved. Nothing. I stare at myself in my smashed mirror, I look up and down at the blank, expressionless creature looking back at me. You don't understand a word I'm saying, do you?
